All I have is a Dream.. » I worry about

Judge Much?

Another Dreamer — Sun, 10 Apr 2011 16:25:45 +0000

Easiest thing to do as a human being is to judge others. Each generation starts with a set of values and everyone is judged against this set. Go astray from this trail and 100 eyes follow you with disdain. So we play nice and stick to validated paths. How sad?
And it’s not just the older generation who passes on these judgments. We are equally responsible. We do it everyday, with everyone. Bad mother, slut on metro, irresponsible father!! How many of these labels did you pass in last one week? How many were really deserved? How many were based on your archaic idea of behavior?
I get it. It’s easy to put a label on a person without really getting to know her/him. And of course, it’s tax free. No one needs permission to do it. It provides cheap and easy entertainment. It also gives you a new topic to talk about.
But have you ever thought about the aftermath, the result? The fact that you just reinforced an idea that some of us have tried centuries to fight?
Worse are women. Labeling other women because of clothes, smoking habits? Really!!!
Colleague comments about a girl she saw in metro, who was openly displaying her bra straps. According to this colleague, that girl should’ve dressed appropriately and she was inviting men to molest her.
100yrs of women freedom!! This is what we have in the end. Someone fought for you to have right to vote. Someone fought, so you could be educated and treated equally. And you repay all that by repeating obsolete ideas, Making sure other women (like your friends/daughters) stay down. Shame on you. Right to be equal, to stand up on our own is Huge. Don’t throw it away just because society says women need to behave in certain manner. Stand up for yourself and other women.

Help is around the corner

Another Dreamer — Fri, 21 Jan 2011 11:56:41 +0000

Today I read a very interesting post. One line in that blog is haunting me, “And I cut myself”. As a teenager, I did things I’m not very proud of. I repeated them in 20s. Certain instances I have blocked from my memory. Many of friends have faced same. And They all were cries for Help. We looked around, found no one and resorted to hurting ourselves. Should we have done it? Of course Not. We were not smart or emotionally equipped to handle certain situations. And sadly, there was no one around to talk about it. Why?
Because, As a Society (Indian One), we look down on depression. We believe it’s an imaginary problem and doesn’t require any help. In some cases, maybe not. But in some cases, Yes, it’s needed.
Going to a psychologist or psychiatrist is not encouraged. Why not? Do we realize how many lives can be saved? Yes, we are Indians and we have families to help us. But not everything can be discussed with families and friends. And what if they are the reason?
What are we really afraid of? I tell you what. As Indians, we don’t like to let strangers know that we might have a problem at home. Nobody should realize that we might not be perfect. Nobody should be able to judge us. Dirty Laundry is not even acknowledged, let alone be aired. We are brilliant in denials. and We believe denial means problem doesn’t exist.
Can we somehow get over ourselves and start treating such problems as real problems? Can we please not call a person crazy just because he/she went to a psychiatrist? Can we please be open enough that our kids can ask us for help?

PS: I know all families are not like that. Sadly, most are. I myself suffer from Anxiety problems and if not for timely intervention by family and medical help, I might not be where I’m today. And that’s one of the reasons I’m so fascinated by Psychology as a field.

My world is different from yours

Another Dreamer — Tue, 11 Jan 2011 12:51:38 +0000

“You are not in touch with reality”, my parents told me last week.
While I can go on and on about their refusal to look beyond their reality, I realized there’s a grain of truth in it. After spending certain years in IT industry or any specific industry (esp the one that pays well), your view about life becomes very limited. And not just us, it’s true about kids studying in certain urban cities and colleges too.
We don’t know real world. We complain about government policies, road conditions, long queues. But that’s about it. We don’t even know which policy is actually needed and which is not. How many of us are concerned that onion is selling for 80 Rs a Kilo today. Yes, it was a headline and that was about it. Are we affected? No. We are the generation that spends 500/-on coffee for two. How can a small vegetable make dent in our life style?
And it’s not just about cost/value of things. It’s also about how you look at certain things. For an IT professional like me, everything should be accessible via net. I can virtually live off internet. Shop, order food, chat, read, watch movies. Everything I need is here.
I forget at times that most people are not this comfortable with internet. I once dated a Doctor, whose idea of internet was to use hotmail and research work stuff. That was it. He had no idea about youtube and he wasn’t interested either. For me, it was a surprise that anyone can be that unaware about internet. For him, it was a reality.
People have different views about money too. While I cannot imagine not having perfect bag or perfect watch, most people are really not that much concerned with perfectness than they are with price. I used to get upset (still do at times) when people would try to skimp on few bucks or argue why they should pay certain amount. I never understood why one should worry about few 100 bucks when you earning in 5 figures. But, then again, it’s the way you look at money. For someone like me, it’s a mean to an end. For someone else, it’s the end.
Now here’s the big question. Whose demand/requirement is more important? And how can we bridge the gap between people, if we can?
I try to be less judgmental now(yes, it’s hard). But I still can’t relate to so many things and people.
Will I ever be able to?

You reap what you sow..

Another Dreamer — Sun, 22 Aug 2010 08:16:18 +0000

Everytime someone complains about Mr. Kalmadi, I feel sorry for him. What did he do that was so wrong? Aren’t we the one who chose this government? Didn’t we say ‘sab chalta hai’? Don’t we support corruption every day and every where? So he stretched the limit. But this is the new century, no? Where everyone pushes the boundary?
For 50 years, we sat and watched integrity go down. We saw corruption rise to the levels that it started controlling the nation, instead of nation controlling it. We don’t even blink on mention of bribe. However, we do get surprised when we see someone being honest.
We gave Kalmadi right to do everything he wanted. Indirectly or directly, that’s a different issue. But we gave rise to people like him. We gave him and the likes of him the idea that they can get away with everything. We did, no one else.
So don’t complain about state of things, this is what you get for years of closed eyes. Go ahead and bribe that cop giving you a fine for jumping the traffic light. While you are at it, don’t forget to brag about saving 200 bucks on all social networking sites. We’ll like that update too.

Daily routine

Another Dreamer — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 14:16:24 +0000

Knock on the window,
Old man looks on
tattered and battered
He smiles and shows magazine
I nod my head saying no
He pulls out another one
He urges and urges
I give in.
At home, Mom shakes her head
Another one
Add it to the recycle pile

Weather is for rich people..

Another Dreamer — Fri, 02 Jul 2010 06:28:34 +0000

Yes, it is. The ones who can afford Air-conditioners always complain about summers. The ones buying expensive leather overcoats will complain about winter. No one will ever care about the guy on road side who died because of heat or cold. Why should we? After all, it’s not our fault he’s in such situation.
Why can’t he take shelter in some warm place for winters or drink some water in summers? So what if clean water is a luxury afforded to few. So what if no warm places exists for poor. So what we really don’t want to know about it?
It’s monsoon time again. It’s time when we complain about humidity and worry about shoes in mud. And it’s time when poor families struggle for plastic sheets, so that their house can stay dry.
Weather which is universal and is not owned by anyone, is only for people who can afford it. With the divide between classes increasing, don’t you think it’s unfair that a person who can’t even afford 2 times meal now needs to worry about weather as well?
We are the ones increasing carbon imprint, supporting companies like coca-cola, wasting electricity and water. Yet the ones who suffer in end is someone else – Someone who doesn’t really care about global warming or gm food, someone who just wants to get through each day alive.
We are murderers. Each time, there’s a news about someone dying due to extreme weather, look at yourself in mirror and count in how many ways you contributed to it.
There’s still time. Stop. Help others. Help nature. Let’s get humanity on track.

PS: yeah yeah. I sound too preachy. But atleast I’m taking baby steps. what about you?

And you wonder why I don’t drink coca-cola..

Another Dreamer — Fri, 08 Jan 2010 06:40:11 +0000

Not to mention, it’s unhealthy. Not to mention, it’s one of the biggest marketing scams of century. Here are few more reasons to avoid it.

Ready to make a small change?

Another Dreamer — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 06:33:31 +0000

Interesting Insight on use of paper cups.

I already use my own mugs and usually try to travel with my own as well. What are you doing today to save trees?

Unwanted advice for all parents

Another Dreamer — Wed, 06 Jan 2010 13:06:39 +0000

Here’s the thing.. I love make-up. I might not apply it a lot or regularly but I still love it.
But can we somehow stop modeling/tv/movie industry to use it on kids?
I just saw portfolio snaps of 6 year old with complete make-up. Why on earth would you want to expose your child to all those unnecessary chemicals? Aren’t the ones they inhale everyday in air enough? It’s a known fact that even these so-called herbal cosmetics use chemicals which are not so friendly to your skin. And have you read the bottles, they say ‘keep away from reach of children’. Even adults eat lipsticks and you expect a 6 yr not to.
Duhhhh!!!

They are kids. They look cute naturally. They don’t need anything. Their smiles are enough.
Just because Hannah Montana’s dad is crazy enough to let her wear all that makeup doesn’t mean your kids need it as well.

Indian Politics and its Issues

Another Dreamer — Tue, 05 May 2009 08:02:35 +0000

Congress wants BJP to expel Mr. Modi.
Everyone is against BJP because it’s Hindu Oriented Approach.
Congress wants Muslims to feel safe.
BSP wants Dalits to be safe.
Left wants Capitalists to go away.

But no one wants my country to succeed. No one mentions bad infrastructure in most places. No one cares that majority of country lacks basic necessary items to survive. No one cares half the children in my country are on street. No one is even mentioning Environmental issues. Corruption is still a forgotten term.
If we can focus so much on religion and Castes, Can’t we spend just a bit time on real issues?

By the way, Hate Mr.Modi all you want, You just can’t ignore him. Mr. Modi is one of the most talked about politician, both in negative and positive sense. He has made Gujarat economically the most viable state today. His dedication to development of state has all CEOs singing his praises. People coming from Ahmadabad seem to agree as well. Don’t believe me?? Try picking up 2 month old issues of India Today where they focused on Gujarat.